A Great Grandmother with dogs who is fighting breast cancer. This blog is to keep friends and family up on the latest happenings in my life.

Friday, December 31, 2010

The End of 2010–Beginning of 2011

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A spring day to end the old year, 56 degrees.  Kids are out playing in short sleeved shirts, tops are down on convertibles.  We know how to appreciate good weather when we get it.

Went to the antique barn/shop today and visited with my friends.  Everyone seems ready for a new year.

I got over my snit about the dogs and the rescue people.  People are strange, you can’t always avoid strange people.  I have to remember one of my favorite sayings – “get over it”.

Health wise I still have a rash on my head and now have sores on my tongue. 

We had a very small earth quake yesterday morning about 7:55 a.m.  I felt it but thought it was just me doing my usual wobble walk in the morning.  There wasn’t any damage, just a little tremble.

I took a walk around the back yard, the snow is gone and there is green grass here and there.  Spring is just waiting to spring – but not quite yet.

later….

 

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Thursday–Melting Day

The snow is melting!  Next we are to get rain.  This is Ohio after all.

Went shopping today, the post office, the drugstore, and groceries. 

Wore out carrying packages into the house but then didn’t nap. 

I actually happened to buy a dog food that Bandit eats without broth on it.  It is for older dogs – maybe he can count.

RANT WARNING 

Bandit is a rescued dog.  In this dog rescue thing I am to ask for heart worm and flea protection for the dog.  I can also buy it and turn in the bill. 

I was given a name of the person who handles this.  I emailed her and told her what I needed.

I received an email back telling me to see another woman (first name only) about that.  There are at least two women in the group with that first name.

Now this is a “group” on yahoo so if you email the group everyone gets the message. 

So I emailed the group with my question about getting the meds for Bandit.

The first person I had asked emailed the group saying – “I already answered her question!”

That is yelling! 

So I privately emailed her again telling her the problem of there being two people with that first name and told her I didn’t need the hassle.

Maybe I’m just in the mood to be angry but I don’t appreciate being yelled at thru the email.

I have only met one of these women and she was a very nice lady.  I hope someday to meet more of them, maybe even the one who is rude.

Guess I had forgotten how some people can be as my friends are so wonderful.

Thank goodness for my carefully chosen friends.

later….

 

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Day after chemo

Okay, I spoke too soon.  I got heartburn and burps and hiccups in the evening Monday and took a pill for nausea.  Slept very well.   Still a bit groggy Tuesday morning.  Stomach still not happy. 

Maybe it’s the snacks I eat like chocolate pretzels.   Why eat chocolate pretzels?  Why do people climb mountains?  Because they are there.

Another nausea pill today.  Trying to behave better about eating.  Took a nap this afternoon.

Since some of my medical team is reading this I am trying to keep it real. 

A PET scan had been set up a week too early so I got that straightened out.  Now it is the 11th of January.  That will tell the tale of how all this chemo is working.  Won’t have results for a while so patience is in the future – and the present.

It got above freezing for a bit today so the snow is sinking, not down to mud yet but it will be soon.

And, yes, that little white dog is very tasty but he will have to wait until the stomach thing settles before he gets finished off.

later….

 

Monday, December 27, 2010

Chemo Day and Another Dog?

Today was chemo day.  I spent most of the time there chatting with the other patients. 

One woman’s husband had worked at the same place I had.  When he called she handed me the phone.  We chatted about old times and agreed to connect on facebook.

She was being treated for some sort of myoloma.  She explained how she had been able to use her own bone marrow for a transplant.  That was amazing to me.  They took it out and then were able to separate the bad cells from the good ones.

My blood tests were all high.  That shot they gave me really hepped up my bone marrow. 

Lory took me and brought me home.  She did some shopping while I got drugs.

When I got home I made a few phone calls and ate some of a small pork roast I had put in the crock pot this morning.  Very tasty and tender.  My sense of taste isn’t as good as it once was but I eat anyway. 

Had some burps on the way home but ignored them.

A friend of mine brought me a cake for Christmas.  It was a very cute little dog with footprints around the plate.

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I listened carefully and am sure I heard him say “bite me” so I did, in the rear.

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So the “another dog” will not be around long as I have a sweet tooth.  This may be the best kind of dog to have.

I know I will sleep well tonight as I only dozed last night, 1:30 to 4:00 a.m.

Tomorrow I plan to do some shopping – that dang food thing again for both me and the beasts I live with. 

later….

 

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Every Day Day

Boring post alert.

Okay, I don’t post every day because I assume you don’t want to hear about the boring routine of my everyday life. 

I get up, let dogs out of their cages, let dogs out of the house.  Go to the bathroom, put on more clothes, let dogs back into the house.   Turn on Fox News, Feed dogs, eat something, usually yogurt. 

I take a shower & put eye drops in my eyes and chew my vitamins, I’ve switched to chewable vitamins as regular ones get stuck in my throat.

I check for email and check www.woot.com.  That is a site that sells one thing each day.  I got a TV on there once.  You never know when they will have a deal I can’t refuse.  Some of their chatter is entertaining, also.

I watch Dr. Phil if I am staying home, or run errands, like the post office or the grocery store.

I eat about every 2 hours and drink V-fusion all day long.  I’m supposed to be eating nutritious foods.

The dogs go out again at noon time or maybe before and they expect a treat when they come in.

After lunch I take a nap, Teddy joins me on the couch.  Once in a while Bandit does, too, but only when he is already there and I fit in around him. 

I watch Animal Planet or USA or TNT on TV.  I play games on www.pogo.com.

I do a load of laundry or wash dishes.  Some days a cook a lot but most days I reheat food already prepared.  Feed the dogs again in the evening.

Today is a steroid day before chemo day.  So I take more pills than usual. 

I call people to be sure I have a ride to and from the doctor’s office on Monday. 

Snow has been drifting down all day long but not adding up to anything. 

I once talked to a couple of girls in Texas who had never seen snow.  Their friend had seen it once and said the strange thing about snow is that it is quiet.  All other kinds of weather make some sort of sound.

Actually as I read over this post it sounds like I am pretty busy.

later…. 

 

Friday, December 24, 2010

Merry Christmas & New Bathtub

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Wishing everyone a very Merry Christmas.  Happy Birthday to the baby Jesus.

No picture of the tub on the front porch, sorry.  It was carried straight into the house.  It is impossible to get a good picture of it in the bathroom, can’t get far enough away in that small room.

So, take my word for it, I have a new bathtub.  I used it Thursday morning and it worked fine. 

Of course, getting a new bathtub involved removing all the little extras from the bathroom, like the shower curtain and the hamper.  Also putting them back afterward.

I have a rash of little red itchy bumps on my scalp.  For now I am just wearing a silk scarf in case I’m allergic to something I’ve been putting on my head.  Synthetic fabrics have made me itchy in the past so I am sticking to natural fibers for a while.

The weather predictors are changing their minds every few hours about what will happen the next few days.  Just a little snow can cause lots of problems around here. 

People should learn to test the streets in a safe spot, step on the brakes and see if they can keep control of their vehicle. 

Hope everyone has a safe and peaceful holiday season.

later….

 

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Monday and Tuesday

Monday evening - Promptly at 12:00 midnight Sunday night, my La Crosse Technology sonic clock changed from p.m. to a.m. so the verdict is in – 12:00 midnight is 12:00 a.m.

Yes, I was up at midnight Sunday night.  I drowsed for 4 or so hours that night. 

Susan took me to my chemo appointment.  She stayed to hear what the doctor had to say.  There was not a lot of encouraging news.  There will be a scan in January to see how the chemo is working after taking 2 three week rounds of it. 

There are several options – it could have stopped the tumors from growing, it could have reduced the tumors size, it could have eliminated the tumors.  Or it could have done nothing to stop the spread of the tumors in the liver. 

We just won’t know until the scan is done.

I got a prescription for a wig.  I will call and ask if my insurance will cover most of the cost.  Maybe a professional one won’t be so scratchy and uncomfortable on my head.

I received Zometa and Taxol today.  I slept through most of the chemo.  I get all slack jawed and zombie looking when I sleep.  Sorry for the observers of that.

Tuesday – I took tylenol p.m. at bedtime and slept until 3:00 a.m. then woke up wide awake.  Got up and read for a while, then fell back asleep until 9:00 a.m.  I think I’m getting enough sleep.

Just called the shop that provides things for us women cancer patients and asked about wigs. 

The lady tells me that Medicare won’t pay anything for wigs.  Must be that since bald men are accepted so bald women are okay, too.   She will call my supplement insurance to see if they will pay anything.  She will call me back.

I have gotten dressed early because my new bathtub is supposed to be delivered today.  They may just leave it on the front porch until they come to install it. 

This is a hill billy sort of town so that will be cool to have a bathtub on the front porch, even for just a day.  I may have to get a picture of that.

I feel pretty drugged this morning – DUH.  Doing some laundry and the usual Tuesday stuff.

Stay tuned….

Later….

 

 

 

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Early Christmas Celebration

It isn’t often that I get all my grandchildren AND greatgrandchildren together at one time AND held still long enough to get a picture.

We met at Susan and Tim’s home for our celebration of Christmas.

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Left to right – Jake, Willie, Jaryen held by Charlotte with Carson in front of her, and Andrea.

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Carson was all dressed up with a tie and jacket.

 

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Carlotte and Derrick, her special friend posed with Jake looking on.

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Cookies were baked by all the women.  There is a story behind these cookies and it’s a bit of a ramble so look out. 

When my parents got married in 1935 my Mother baked cookies but my Father didn’t like them much.  So she asked his Mother what kind of cookies he liked.  She got the recipe for molasses cookies from her Mother-in-law. 

The recipe was passed to me along with the story and instructions for exactly how to bake them, which is a bit tricky. 

The first time I went to buy the molasses for this “old family recipe” I read the label on the bottle – it was our recipe right there for all the world to read.  What a surprise.

When they are baking you wait until they puff up and the tops crack, then you take them out and let them sit on the cookie sheet to finish baking before you take them off.  That way they are nice and soft and chewy. 

If you wait too long they are harder.  Some people probably like them that way but we prefer the soft ones.

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Lory took pictures while her special friend, John looked on with approval.

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Last but not least – me and my girls.  We ate, we laughed, we remembered old times. 

I even had a private concert from Willie on his guitar with the new amplifier.  

I was a little gabby as I am taking those steroids again today since tomorrow is a chemo day for me.  It’s not always a bad thing to gab – I hope. 

Later….

Friday, December 17, 2010

Snow is a four letter word

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Just that ridge at the end is left to shovel. 

Tips on shoveling snow -  don’t dress too warmly as you will be exercising and you don’t want to get too sweaty in the cold temperatures.

- throw the snow a bit back from the edge you want so if there is more snow you will have a place to put it.

- at the end of the driveway throw all the snow to the right side so the snowplow cannot move your heap back into the middle of your driveway.

- if possible throw snow against the foundation of the house for insulation.

- don’t rush, get a count going to pace yourself.

- have some hot chocolate when you are done.

These things were learned while living in New Hampshire.  They know about snow in New England. 

I got all dressed up to shovel snow today, found the shovel, and then noticed that my wonderful, kind, thoughtful neighbors had already made a good start on my driveway. 

I shoveled for a short while but will have to do it in short efforts.  My energy isn’t too great.  Maybe if I wait a while that neighbor will finish it for me.

I’m not planning on going anywhere today or tomorrow but someone will pick me up on Sunday and Monday and they need to get into the driveway.

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As you can see Teddy has been eating snow.  Do you need to tell a dog not to eat yellow snow?  I hope not.  Bandit is camera shy and runs for cover when he sees it.  He has no mustache for the snow to stick to anyway.

Later….

Monday, December 13, 2010

Snow & Lab Test

The snow didn’t add up to a lot but it was enough to delay schools by 2 hours.  It also postponed my grandson’s performance last night.  At least I didn’t have to miss it due to the weather. 

In the picture below you can see Bandit, the looong dog.  He is very careful going out the door when there is snow.  He has seen snow before.  It might be deeper than it looks and his legs are short.

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The sun on the snow helps but we aren’t supposed to get above freezing this week so the snow will stay.  Didn’t need to use the 4-wheel drive at all.  The wind blows light snow off the driveway and this was a light fluffy snow.

The roads weren’t bad this afternoon.  Some side streets were still snow covered and in some places the wind had blown the snow back onto the road.

The blood test today, this is a no chemo week, showed a low white blood cell count.  That means I might catch a cold or flu easily.  I was given a shot of Neupogen to jazz up my bone marrow so it will make more white blood cells. 

After the Dr’s office I finished my Christmas shopping and went to the health food store.  Also went to the thrift store and found a couple of tops.

I haven’t shopped for winter clothes for quite a while.  I am not a big fan of shopping.  When I was getting dressed today I found a couple of tops that should be thrown out.  So I have now replaced them.  It just happened that the ones I liked were 1/2 off so for less than $5.00 I got 2 good tops.  Good on me.

My daughters consulted their calendars and have designated Sunday as our Christmas so it’s a good thing I got my shopping done today.

later….

Friday, December 10, 2010

Buzz

I did it, or rather my granddaughter did it for me.  I went to her beauty school this morning and had her take off the falling hair. 

She also styled a wig for me.  The wig is not real hair so when it was cut the little tiny pieces are more prickly than real hair.  It is now drying from being washed in an attempt to get rid of those tiny pieces.

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My whole head feels like the back of a little boys neck after that first trip to the barber.

Susan stopped by for lunch and took the pictures.

My head is cold even though it is above freezing today.  The snow is going away fast.  We are supposed to get rain or snow this week-end. 

Hope it doesn’t keep us away from Willie’s performance Sunday night.  He is in a band that will be playing at the Canal Street Tavern.

That’s all, just wanted to share the bald head with everyone. 

And the scar from where I had a cyst removed years ago is not a smiley face as I asked for, it is a tiny straight line.  You just can’t trust anyone.

Congratulations to my sister for passing her driving test in a 38 foot RV!

Later….

 

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Wednesday Shopping

Pushed the energy level today to go do some shopping.  The list has been growing for several days.  Of course, it was very cold but it felt good to get out of the house and do something.  I got gift cards for most of the Christmas gifts I will give.  Just need one more that hasn’t been found yet.

I also picked up the laptop computer at the shop.  There was nothing wrong with it.  No charge.  

I give up.  It quit on me and wouldn’t come back on the next day.  Maybe the plug wasn’t in good and the battery ran down but it usually gives a warning before it does that.  All’s well and end well.  Now the old desk top computer can get a rest.

I took a nap when I got home.

I have been getting “comments” on old blogs, the comments do not publish.  Apparently this is a new way of getting ads to people.  I suppose there is a way to block them but it isn’t worth the trouble. 

Some of them are funny, some in French.  The French one I translated by going to a Google translation site.  It just said something about having great knowledge.  I’m sure I am supposed to try to find out what that is.

Short Ramble Warning -

Got a call from my brother today about a website he was interested in.  It has a film of how they harvested ice in 1919.  I watched it and it is interesting.  I never knew how they did that.

Of course the video is in black and white and there is no sound.

www.farmcollector.com is the website.  They have other videos on youtube.  Back then there wasn’t  TV or all the distractions we have today.  They worked hard and probably were ready for bed at dark. 

I guess I’m glad we have all the stuff we have today.

later….

 

Monday, December 6, 2010

Monday, Chemo Day #3

Today 2 of my friends and I went to lunch, then they dropped me at the Dr's office for my chemo.  Now one more person knows where I go and how to pick me up if I need them.  Friends are WONDERFUL.

I think I have found the limit of the reduction I can do on the steroids the day before chemo.  Today I burped a few times during chemo and that can be a precurser to upchucks.  Maybe even step it back up by 4 mgs.

Several of the other women there were chatting and we shared stories.  One young woman with lung cancer was particularly troubled.  This was her first chemo so some advise was shared.  We shared the reactions we both get to the steroids the day before.  Apparently that is standard issue. 

Lory picked me up and brought me home.  Getting home I had to be careful walking, a bit unsteady on my feet.  So I guess that solves the question of whether I should drive myself to and from chemo.  Bummer.  Next Monday is a week off from chemo, I just need to go for blood tests.  I CAN drive myself for that. 

Now for the projects of last night. The tote with a mixture of tools took a while and had to be done on my knees on the hard floor so I took it in small doses.

The before picture -

 The after picture - doesn't look like much difference but it really is much more organized.  There were pieces of metal that I had no idea what they could be used for so I threw them away.
 The really hard part was the string mess.  At least this could be done at the counter sitting in a comfortable bar stool.  Before -
 After - I found the plastic part in the bottom of the tote.  I think this is a thing to make a straight line, maybe in a garden to make long rows.  There is probably a second piece for the other end of the line but it was not found.  If anyone has other suggestions for its use, let me know.

That mess of string almost defeated me.  I got out the scissors and showed them to the tangles.  They immediately were solved - so I kept going.  By midnight I was still involved with knots and forgot to look at the sonic clock to see whether it said a.m. or p.m. at 12:00.  There will be other times to check that, if I remember.
So if I get my vegtable garden area tilled and if some one wants to help with a garden next spring and if we want straight rows, this tool may come in handy.  At least I know where to find it now.

Now for a quiet evening and maybe some sleep tonight.  One of the nausea medicines makes me sleepy so it may get used tonight.

Later....

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Haircut

Do I look a little scared?  I think those big eyes are due to steroids and my hair usually looks better than that.  We were going for a big change so we didn't fix it for the before picture.


This is the before picture.  At the advice of my beautician daughter I just got a severe haircut tonight. 

I had to agree that the after was much better than a buzz as well as better than the before.  This will work until it all falls out and when it falls out it won't be such a mess.  I felt a draft during the haircut.



The floor was swept and it was done.  I think I look fatter fuller in the face without all that hair.
It's going to be cold this week so a hat may be in order just for warmth.  Not supposed to get above freezing this week.  Winter is really here.

Spent some quality time on the phone with my sister this evening - just before the haircut.  She got a hint of how I babble when on those drugs.  Also opened the box she sent and sniffed all the scented candles that they make in Fredericksburg, TX.   What an aromatic gift.  The cookies are good, too.  Thanks Sis.

Okay I have to get started on a project to use some of this hyperness.  It will not be as noticable as the one last week.  I will be untangling a tote with tools tossed in it.  Somehow a long string got in there and got all mixed with everything else, nails, saws, etc.  A scissors will be used. 

Still using the desk top computer and it took forever to figure out how to get the pictures on it and then posted.  Why do computer geeks have to change things when they aren't broken? 

Later....




Saturday, December 4, 2010

Falling Things

Things are falling here, things like snow, things like hair.  It started this morning.  If I run my hands thru my hair I get 20 or 30 hairs.  The biggest surprise was that a couple of those hairs were brown.

The snow is also falling, slowly, not really a storm at all, but it has added up to 3 or 4 inches anyway. 

Last night my laptop died suddenly.  I am doing this on the old desk top computer.  Today I took the laptop to the Dr., the PC Dr whose office is just a few doors from my house. 

He said it would be Monday before I heard the extent of the damage.  Then he asked why I was still in town since I usually go away this time of year.  I told him I was tied to doctors this winter.  We chatted about the neighborhood and the weather and the fire that happened a few months ago in the restaurant next door to his store.  His area was also damaged so he was closed for a couple of months.

Tomorrow I plan to get a buzz and get this hair thing over with.  If it had started on top I could have worn a hat to cover that part but it started along my neck and around my ears.  So that plan won't work.  I will just be happy if my scalp stops tingling.

Tomorrow is another steroid day.  The dose will be reduced again.  Maybe I'll be able to sleep more.  Hope springs eternal.

later....

Friday, December 3, 2010

Usual Friday

I am being poisoned!  Looked up the chemo drug I am getting, Taxol, on the internet.  It is made from the bark of a specific kind of yew tree.  Do not chew on the bark of yew trees.

Still have my hair but my scalp tingles a lot. 

I am on a 2 hour eating schedule.  A whole big meal sets in my stomach like a brick.  So I break up the meals and eat more often.  Used to have yogurt with cereal mixed into it for breakfast.  Now I have the yogurt then 2 hours later, the cereal. 

Received a nice phone call from the doctor’s office this morning.  The test for HER2 was negative.  That means there won’t need to be another chemical added to my chemo – I think.  A negative test is always good.

The snow has melted but more is predicted. 

Spent the afternoon at the barn with Lory and my friends.  Tried on a purple wig – just not my style.  Picked up some scarves in anticipation of lost hair.

Picked up the mail and found a Christmas package from Texas.  It smells REALLY good. 

The temperature didn’t get much above 40 degrees today.  We are due some more snow tonight or tomorrow.  I have the snow melt stuff and a shovel in the mud room so I’m ready. 

later….

 

 

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Snow

It started with just a few white flecks floating around in the air early this morning.  At noon it was still not amounting to much.  By 3:00 p.m. it had covered most of the ground. 

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See those two bowling balls gazing balls? They show up nicely in the snow.

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I guess no one wants to sit on the bench beside the driveway today.

I overate last night so had a stomach ache.  Lesson learned.  I will no longer be a member of the clean plate club.

Just received a breathless phone call from daughter, Susan, telling about her drive home from work and several close calls on the road.  She witnessed several accidents right in front of her and stopped to call 911 and be sure everyone was okay. No one injured but some cars were dented up. ICE on the road.

The dogs have been in and out extra times to check out the snow.  Finally got them settled down while I took a nap this afternoon.

I think I will hibernate till spring.

later….

 

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

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Wonderful wonderful dogs – they let me sleep till 10:00 a.m. this morning.  I kept my bedroom door closed during the night and that seems to keep them from waking me up.  Maybe I just don’t hear them stirring around in their cages.  Whatever it is, it works and I will use it.

Getting up that late throws meal times off.  So I will just munch thru the day and not worry about it.

Rainy day today, had to encourage the dogs to go out.  I was so pleased with them that I even dried them off with a towel when they came in.

Coming down off all the steroids I kind of crash and feel shaky and clumsy today.  Called in the prescription for next week, have to pick that up this afternoon. 

My hair doesn’t seem to be falling out yet.  I keep testing.  I find tickles in my nose and find nose hairs in the hanky when I blow it.  Had not thought about those hairs coming out.

This journey is a continual surprise.  I learn something all the time.  For 48 hours after chemo I am to be careful with bodily fluids. 

It is easier since I live alone, no one else to worry about except the dogs.  I am to put the lid down and flush the toilet twice.  I have heard that putting the lid down when flushing is always a good idea.  Think of that mist in the bathroom where your toothbrush is.  Yuck.

On that thought I think I will get something to eat.

later….

 

 

Monday, November 29, 2010

Monday Evening

Chemo was the same as last week.  No new drugs and the time it took was about the same.  The place was very busy probably due to the Thanksgiving holiday.

Susan took me and Lory picked me up. 

Lory was happy with my computer desk job and was glad I found some of her items there. 

So I got to see and chat with both my daughters today.  How great is that.

Now if I can recover from all those steroids and not get too sick from the chemo, I’ll get on with my life.  Guess I’ll get on with my life anyway.

It has been pointed out to me that if I pray for patience God may create ways for me to practice more patience.  That comes under the saying “be careful what you ask for, you might get it”.

So forget the patience thing – please.

Later….

Night Before and Day Of

Sunday 6:30 p.m. – No head pounding, just a hyped up feeling.  Time to go for using this drug induced energy to get something done.

Computer desk before:

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9:30 p.m. - Computer desk after:

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Do not notice stray wires or that post-it note on top of the computer tower. 

Items found were sorted, safety pins were organized, buttons put with buttons, items to be sold at the antique barn were separated from items to be kept.  A trash bag was filled.  Everything was dusted. 

One item I found was part of a scented candle from Fredericksburg, TX.  It must have gotten lost in the shuffle.  So I lighted it and had aroma therapy while I worked.

No, I will not come to your house and do this. It needs to be done in several areas of my house so I will be busy enough right here.

12:00 p.m.- Not sleepy but have taken 2nd dose of steroids and will try to at least get some rest.

9:00 a.m. Monday – Spent about an hour of “lay awake” time thinking about whether midnight is a.m. or p.m.  If 11:59:59 is p.m. then 12:00 should be p.m. but if someone says 12:00 a.m. my first thought is midnight.  Probably my thought process is off.

Dozed for about 3 hours, maybe a bit more.  Read a lot and felt a bit nauseas off and on.  Turned on my fireplace for a while.  Very nice atmosphere.

I just finished reading Heaven is for Real by Todd Burpo.  I saw the author interviewed on TV and ordered the book.  I recommend it and plan to pass the book on to my daughter who claims she is an atheist. 

First I will extract a promise that she will read it.  I may have to exert ill parent authority on her. 

This morning I need to make a run to the bank to deposit 2 refund checks from medical bills.  Every time I pay a bunch of those bills some of them send the money back.  DARN 

I’ll post any new news this evening.

Later….

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Day Before

Sunday will be another “day before chemo” day.  The steroids I take on the day before are DEXAMETHASONE.  They come in 4 mg strength.  I am to take 4 of them 24 hours before and 4 more 12 hours before chemo.  Last week I took 5 each time.  I hope to be able to reduce the dose each week.

We will see if I have the pounding head the same as last week.  I have a prescription of HYDROCODON-ACETAMINIOPHEN for if I get that pounding again. 

I am trying to plan productive activity for the inability to sleep on Sunday night.  Maybe clean.

To night Susan took me to church.  It’s one of those non-denominational churches where you come as you are.  They serve coffee and the hymns are projected on a couple screens.  There is a band instead of an organ.

Susan and Willie brought me home from church and Willie got to meet Bandit. It was a love match.  If you pet the right spot, and that’s just about anywhere, Bandit’s back leg gets going.  Sometimes both back legs get going and he has to lay down.

In getting ready to go to church I had a problem getting my hair to behave, the sides kept sticking out.  Hmmmmm.  I pulled out the scissors and cut off the pieces that stuck out, then trimmed the top a little.  I’ve done this before but not with such abandon.  Since it’s all going to fall out soon I can whack away all I want.

Actually it will save time if I can just slap on a wig instead of fixing and fixing and spraying.  I may even post a bald picture on here. It depends on how gnarly my head is.  Don’t want to scare people.

later….

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Thanksgiving

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The weather is nasty but it IS the end of November in Ohio.  The rain that didn’t come in August, September, and October has arrived.  There is a flood warning for this area but I am on high ground.

Thank goodness it is just rain today.  Tomorrow it may be nastier with lower temps.

I plan to visit both my daughters today and eat a little with each family.  I feel pretty good, just a bit icky now and then.  I am thankful to be enjoying this season.

DOGS -

Spoiled house dogs hate rain.  They look out the open door and shake as if they are already getting wet. 

Last night I tried for the second night to leave them out of their cages all night.  There was a large puddle in the kitchen this morning. 

Considering the size of the puddle and the size of the dogs I think it was a Bandit puddle.  The kitchen floor slants a bit so the puddle had run from the back door to the middle of the kitchen.

Good morning beloved master!  Of course, I was only wearing socks when I found the puddle. 

Needless to say they waited quite a while before they got breakfast.  Guess where they will be spending the night tonight? 

Have a wonderful peaceful holiday.

later….

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Tuesday

Slept last night, slept this afternoon.  I’ve heard you can’t catch up on sleep but I seem to be trying.

Looks like I might have two Thanksgiving dinners on Thursday.  One from each of my daughters.  Maybe I’ll take doggy bags home.  I can’t seem to eat much at a time which has been predicted by the chemo booklet.  So I graze all the time. 

Made a trip to the drugstore this afternoon.  The prescription for the steroids has to be filled each week.  Might ask for a new prescription that lets me pick up a months’ worth at a time.

Still having beautiful weather.  Doesn’t seem normal for the end of November. Sunshine and 50 degrees.

I tried on one of my new hats today and then forgot I had it on.  I laid down on the couch.  Teddy tried to sniff the hat from over the arm of the couch.  He wasn’t sure it was me in that hat.

After I talked to him he got over it and jumped up on the couch with me.

I  took the dog beds out of the cages and put them on the floor in my bedroom last night.  After being put on his bed 3 times Teddy stayed there all night.  Bandit paced around and slept somewhere else.  Probably in the bathroom as I leave that light on.  He has issues that I don’t understand. 

I feel just a little bummed today but not really bad.  Stomach is a little uncertain but that was expected.

I used to buy pumpkins and make pies from scratch.  Today I ordered 2 pumpkin pies so I can contribute to the dinners I am invited to.  I’m sure they won’t be as good as my homemade ones. 

My great grandson Jaryen is two years old today.  Happy birthday.

Later….

Monday, November 22, 2010

So Far So Good

Last night I slept about 2 1/2 hours, the steroids were working.  I got permission to reduce the dose by 20% next week.

My good friend, LaDonna, came and drove me to the appointment.

Got home a little while ago.  I probably could have driven myself but I didn’t.  I would like to try it next week but Lory is discouraging it.

They gave me more steroids IV and lots of benadryl IV before they gave me the Taxol.  There was a 1/2 hour wait between those drugs and the chemo.

The Taxol was given slowly for 10 minutes, then I was checked for reactions, then a little faster for 10 more minutes, 3 times at 10 minutes, then, since I had no special reaction, the rest was pumped faster for 1/2 hour. 

They showed me a collection of hats and wigs.  I picked 2 hats and a white wig.  The nurse said I would probably not lose my hair this week, but next week it would start falling out.  At that point most people just buzz it off. 

You can lose a lot of heat through the top of your head so I will wear a hat at night. 

Since my granddaughter is going to beauty school I will delegate the buzz job to her.  In fact, just for practice she is giving me a haircut Wednesday evening.  In 2 weeks she will be doing people at the school.

I had a boiled mashed egg with a little mayo on it and have a dish of applesauce sitting here with some crackers nearby.  I am not to eat whole wheat bread, just white bread.  I don’t care for white bread so I will probably stick to crackers.

The chemo kills fast growing cells which include the lining of the digestive system.  So I should eat nothing that might scratch my innards. 

The only reaction I had with the chemo was a little flush from the steroids and a chemical taste in my mouth from the Taxol.

The Dr. is doing one more test on the biopsy material (HER2 NEU).  That is the one that says what grade the cancer is and tells how aggressive it is.  If it shows up positive they will add another ingredient to the chemo next week.

The Dr. I had before this one just made a note that it was positive for that test but did not elaborate so they are doing it again to be sure. 

I have appointments for chemo on 11/29, 12/6, then an appointment for blood lab work 12/13.  I see the Dr. again on 12/20, then get more chemo that day.  She said after 2 or 3 rounds they would do more tests to see how it is working.

It was a beautiful day today, 70 degrees.  Very rare for this time of year.  The leaves on the red trees at the hospital had mostly fallen off. 

The dogs were happy to see me come home as I had left them in the cages while I was gone. 

Maybe I will get more sleep tonight, maybe not.  I have lots of books to read if I can’t sleep.

Thanks for all the prayers.  I need courage and patience if you want to get specific.  I do not ask for a cure, God’s will be done.

Later….

 

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Cancering

Homemade mouthwash = 1 quart of water, 1 tablespoon of baking soda, 1 teaspoon of salt.  I am to use that mouthwash several times a day while on chemo.  No commercial mouthwash.  Chemo may cause mouth sores. 

So I have brewed up the mouthwash and put it in an old bear shaped honey container for in the kitchen.  An old ketchup squirt bottle full of it is in the bathroom.

Got a call late Friday afternoon from my oncologist.  The biopsy is the same kind of cancer that started in my breast and moved to my bones and now to my liver.

Thursday I took a nap and woke up with a sore neck.  The curse of having cancer is that everything is viewed through that prism.  Had it moved to my neck?  Was I doomed from now on to this pain in my neck?  It even moved up to the back of my head, OHHH NOOOO!

It lasted until Friday evening, then subsided.  Got to get hold of myself and stop worrying.  What will be will be.  A stiff neck is probably just a stiff neck.

Visited with my friends at the antique barn this afternoon.  They have put out a APB on the guy who stabbed me Tuesday at the hospital.  Smile

Tomorrow I will be on steroids, probably shouldn’t post to this blog in that condition.  If the phone rings I answer it “WHAT?” when I am taking the steroids.  Call at your own risk.

later….

 

 

Friday, November 19, 2010

Friday Before Chemo

Reading about this chemo stuff is a bit scary.  My bodily fluids will be poison for a couple of days after the chemo.  I guess if it is working that makes sense.  I am to flush twice and wash hands extra times.

I’m trying to get things in order so I can take it easy in case I am sick from it.  Got spare dog food today.  Got extra yogurt and a small turkey breast and lots of jello. 

I bought a blender the other day.  I have destroyed two in the past.  Okay, so they were hand me downs but still.  This one is supposed to be able to do ice cubes so maybe it will stand the test.   Haven’t tried it yet.

I have 2 different prescriptions for nausea and the doctor suggested that I try each one before the chemo so I would know their side affects.  The first one I tried, ondansetron, made it feel as if I had a brick in my stomach, didn’t make me sleepy. 

The second one, promethazine, I tried this afternoon.  It made me very sleepy, so I took a nice long nap with 2 dogs on the couch with me.  Picture that.

So now I know and can choose which side affect works at the time I need it.  Maybe bricks in my stomach will be a good thing at some point.

I found the tape measure today.  Bandit is 44 inches from the tip of his nose to the base of his tail.  That’s a loooong dog.  That cage he was in yesterday is 25 inches long.  He managed to fit.

I have an invitation to Thanksgiving dinner from John’s Mother, but don’t know if I will feel fit for human consumption.  That sounds like I will be eaten. LOL 

I’m a bit like an animal – if I don’t feel good I want to hide somewhere till I feel better.  Just leave me alone.

Trying to get Christmas packages ready to mail.  Not doing much this year.  I am basically a bah humbug person. 

later…. 

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Strange World

In Ohio you are supposed to get a new sticker for your car license plate on your birthday.  Lory’s birthday was yesterday. 

This morning a policeman was waiting down the street to check to see if she had gotten her sticker.  She had not. 

That is a small town cop.  He probably has a list of everyone’s birthday in town and lurks nearby, waiting to pounce. 

Other strange happenings are going on.  Last night at 1:57 a.m. some energetic bleary eyed person made a comment on this blog. 

They wanted to tell me about a new vitamin that does wonderful things for men.  Happily they didn’t arrange for it to be published so it only came as an email to me.

I know times are difficult, jobs are scarce.  But to have a job of putting comments about male enhancement on blogs in the middle of the night?  Come on!  Flipping hamburgers would be preferable to that.

It rained in the night, not a lot but the dogs came in with wet feet and damp backs this morning. 

Still feeling a bit under the weather from the biopsy.  I’m taking it easy. 

Getting one more estimate on the new bathtub.

Proof positive that Bandit is jealous of Teddy and tore holes in his dog bed.

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This picture shows him rubbing his head on Teddy’s blanket in Teddy’s cage.  If he rubs his scent on it – it is his.  All doggy blankets and beds are his.  All food dishes are his.  All couches and soft places to lay are his.  He goes into my bedroom and barks with ownership joy.  So I growl at him and he comes out.

Poor Teddy – no wait a minute.  Teddy is sort of passive aggressive, he does a few end around moves and gets what he needs.  I once dropped a cheerio on the floor so he watches and waits for another one.  Some day it will come and he will be ready. 

When I was house breaking him he tried to pee on me several times.  He waits patiently for Bandit to pee, then pees over it. 

It is for sure a turf war in this house.  These beasts I live with are a lot of entertainment.

later….

 

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Number One Child’s Birthday

Parental Ramble Warning………………………………

At some point in the far distant past it occurred to me that my Mother had more to do with my birthday and I did.  So I started sending her flowers on my birthday.

I probably read it somewhere or saw someone on TV suggest that.  It wasn’t an original thought.  It was a fun thing to surprise her that way.

November 17 is my oldest daughter’s birthday, Lorain, otherwise known as Lory.  When it was popular to spell that name “Lori” she chose to spell hers with a “y”.  Her high school jacket had to be sent back to get the spelling right.  The stitching on the error still showed.

She marches to her own drum and I am very proud of her.  Her life has not been easy or perfect but what life is.   As two adult women we can agree to disagree on things.  We even yell at one another sometimes.

At some point in her youth we agreed to say (maybe yell) “GOODBYE” before we slammed down the phone. 

When she was a teen ager I once observed her talking on the phone saying “let me ask my Mother”.  Then she held the phone for a while and told them I had said NO. 

I am sorry I wished her children like herself.

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So today, on her birthday, she brought me flowers.

The arrangement is a combination of things from her friend John’s backyard and from his Mother’s yard and some cut flowers, also a jeweled butterfly from someone’s jewelry box. 

So very special and personal.

Thank you for appreciating your birthday and HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you.

p.s. Here is an awwwww chuckle.  Poor short legged Bandit just sneezed and whacked his nose on the floor.

later….

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Survived Biopsy

Just got back from the hospital a little while ago.  I have had lots of water to drink and some pasta salad and canned peaches to eat – and of course, chocolate!

I wasn’t’ ready to come home at noon as they had thought I would be so my ride friend had to wait quite a while.

Everything went fine.  They thought they might want to use IVP (dye with iodine) so they could see better with the scan machine.  Then they saw that I am allergic to it.  They considered giving me steroids by IV but finally decided to try without the dye.

It worked without IVP dye.  Thank goodness.  I looked on their screen and could see the needle, right beside the spot it needed to be.  They tried again a couple of times and were finally satisfied.

Each time they ran me into the scan machine to check things out and get a new picture..

I was not knocked completely out but had some drugs to help me relax.  I think they just relaxed me enough that I jumped now and then.  I can hold still if I am alert.

Afterward I was to lay on a rolled up towel to put pressure on the spot for 2 hours.  I slept until they brought me some juice and graham crackers.

My friend said I was very pale when I came out of the hospital.  After getting home and letting the dogs out and back in I pinked up.  She left so I could get some rest.

I will not hear any results from this until Monday so, as usual, it is a waiting game.

It is raining today.  We need it very badly.  A 1/2 inch isn’t going to help much when we are down by 8 or 9 inches.

Nap time.

later….

Monday, November 15, 2010

Ready

I am ready for my biopsy tomorrow. 

The trash has been put out to the street. 

The dishes are washed.

A load of laundry has been done. 

I am showered. 

My clothes for in the morning are laid out.

Susan is picking me up at 6:45 a.m. – yes there is a 6:45 in the morning, too.

My friend is picking me up at noon.

Also today I mended a dog bed.  It was the one in Teddy’s little cage. 

Teddy has never torn up anything whereas Bandit tries to “fluff” the hardwood floor.  It works on area rugs which I find in a twist all the time.  He gets on the couch and paws at it so I keep a throw loosely on it so nothing gets torn, just moved around.

I have seen Bandit try to get into Teddy’s cage.  He doesn’t fit. 

The evidence says that Bandit pawed at Teddy’s bed and tore holes in it, spreading the stuffing around a bit.

So now Teddy’s bed is mended and in the kitchen and he is happily laying on it.  I will find something else for his cage.

I think if the bed can move around it might not tear, even when being fluffed and dug up.

I’ve tried leaving their cage doors open when they go to bed in them.  It doesn’t work.  I need my sleep so they get put to bed, locked up for the night.

They will probably be locked up tomorrow while I am gone.

Now to set the alarm and be sure it is set for “a.m.” and not “p.m.”.  I have made that mistake before.

Actually for years I got to work at 6:00 a.m. and worked a 10 hour day.  I was younger then and not spoiled by a few years of retirement.

Thanks to anonymous for the website referral.  I’ll let you know….

later….

 

Friday, November 12, 2010

Biopsy Scheduled and a Ramble

I called this morning to find out when my liver biopsy was going to be.  I needed to arrange transportation.  The hospital called before noon and told me it will be Tuesday, Nov. 16, and to arrive at 7:30 a.m., don’t eat after midnight.  Should be ready to go home by noon.

So I now have a ride there, thanks to daughter Susan.  Lory has to work that day.  I’ll arrange for a friend to pick me up and bring me home.

After getting that call I was free to go over to the antique barn and visit with my friends.  One of them had a wig for me.  It looks a lot like my hair used to look when I got perms.  It will be a good one for going to the bank or when I want to look normal.  I still need something outrageous for other occasions.

Ramble Warning-----------------------------

This week-end is the Planned Parenthood annual book sale.  It is a great sale.  A gymnasium size room packed with long tables full of books with boxes of more books under the tables. 

I used to go on Friday and wait in line for a couple of hours to be one of the first people in.  Sometimes in rain or snow.  I have met people from New York and Pennsylvania and other states in that line. 

They used to have some amazing deals on collectible books.  The last time I went, a couple of years ago, they had started checking prices on the internet and the deals weren’t so good.  I once got a first edition of the 2nd volume of Uncle Tom’s Cabin for very little. 

They have a “finds” section, items that were in a box of donated books but are not books.  I found a primitive calculator there one year, with 5 dials, like the old dial phones, and a stylus to turn the dials which added up what you dialed.  I paid $5.00 and sold it for $200.00 on ebay.  It was a before patent item.

I also always look for the series of books that my Mother taught from in the 1930’s.  I now have several and have started giving them to her grandchildren. 

I used to collect old school books.  It’s an inexpensive thing to collect.  The oldest one I have is 1792.  I also have a couple of the paper back Dick and Jane books that I used in the first grade.  Believe it or not, those are very rare. 

I have stopped collecting as there doesn’t seem to be a market for resale and no one in the family is interested in the collection. 

The ones I like best are the primers.  Those books used to be passed down from child to child and I like to think about all the little hands that had to be washed before they were allowed to hold that special book.  All the stories have a moral to them.

One of the books I have has recipes for a cure for “gravel” and other physical ailments written in the front in pencil.  No other paper was available to write on apparently.

My Mother used to talk about taking turns to have the calendar page at the end of the month so the kids could use the back of it to write on or draw pictures.

Never have found a first edition of McGuffy’s first reader.  The date would be in the 1850’s.  They all say “revised” except for the first edition ones.

Oh well, that’s enough of a ramble.

Later….

 

Thoughts on being bald.

If all my hair falls out I won’t have to pluck all those stray ones on my chin or anywhere else.  

My son-in-law, Tim, says the next time he shaves his head it will be in honor of me.  He is mostly bald anyway so I will say he is already honoring my future baldness.

My brother-in-law wants to arm wrestle while I am taking steroids.  He is also bald so I will assume that is for me.

Had to give Teddy a bath again yesterday.  I don’t know where he finds stuff  (s#!t) to roll in.  I walked all around the backyard and couldn’t find anything.

I’ve been reading all the literature given to me at the doctor’s office.  One paper says avoid acetaminophen but another says use Tylenol only.  Acetaminophen and tylenol are the same thing.  One of the main side effects is bone and muscle pain.  Need to find out for sure what I can take for that. 

My friends have been suggesting that I get a tattoo on the back of my head.  Maybe something like “If you can read this I am bald”.  If there are any other suggestions let me know.  I’m not committing to this tattoo but it’s fun to think about.

Who knows, maybe there are age spots all over my scalp.  Yuck.  There is definitely a wig in my future.  Maybe a spikey red one.

Later….

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Health News

Had a nice breakfast with friends.

Just got back from the doctor’s office.  My oncologist suggested that I get a liver biopsy next week and then start chemo on Nov. 22.  The biopsy hasn’t been scheduled yet, it will be outpatient and I will get drugs.  I love drugs.

Her opinion was that it would be good to compare this biopsy with the one I had 2 years ago just be be absolutely sure it is the same thing. 

I got a prescription for possible  nausea and one for steroids (major steroids) to take the day before the first chemo treatment.  

  Lory went with me and explained that when I am on steroids I can peel wallpaper off the walls with my teeth.  The doctor laughed and said if I didn’t have a bad reaction to the chemo they could reduce the steroids for later treatments.

She says it will be 3 weeks of chemo then 1 week off.  I was given lots of literature to read.  

While looking out the window from the parking garage (4th floor)we got a good view of the landscaping around the area.

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The one above shows alternating red bushes with the evergreens.

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Don’t know what kind of trees these are but they sure are red.  They looked a bit better from above.

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The dogs had gotten into my bedroom while we were gone but they left no presents for me in there.  Good dogs.  Bandit had to go outside and run in circles for a while when we got home.

I left the prescriptions at the drug store for pick-up tomorrow. 
We stopped on the way home at an estate sale.  I bought a styrofoam head for .25 cents.   Might need that for a wig soon.

We also stopped and bought dog food. 

Now I can sit back and take a break and read all this literature….

later….

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Bathtub and the Past

The bathtub issue is ongoing.  A sunken tub was considered and rejected after looking in the cellar where it would be.  The house might fall down if some of those major beams were cut to make room for a sunken tub. 

The bathroom in this house was obviously an add-on.  It bumps out on the side of the house and there is a crawl space dug out under it for the pipes.  When I think about building a house without a bathroom it is unbelievable.

The only record I can find is when this lot was defined, in 1907.  It was probably at that time that the house was built.  It wasn’t built to stand up to the semi trucks that go by so we get some vibrations.

There are 2 chimneys that I have had inspected.  They are not usable so I had them capped.  The chimney’s still bump out into the rooms where there was once fireplaces.

There is evidence of an area where coal was stored in the cellar.  There is an old oil tank in the cellar.  There is a large square of different wood in the floor in the living room where one of those old monstrous furnaces had it’s register. 

Now there is a modern natural gas forced air furnace down there.  Where they had to cut the beams for the ducts there are jacks to hold up each side of the beam. 

Should I try to get that old oil tank out?  How in the world did they get it in?  Was there an outside entrance to the cellar at one time? 

I’ve been told it might still have fumes in it so it couldn’t safely but cut up.  Guess I’ll just leave it down there.  The old saying is “it ain’t eatin no hay”.

So there is one more estimate to be made on the new bathtub.  I’m in no hurry.  The old one works, it’s just very old, plastic, matte finish that is impossible to make look clean.

Decisions – decisions….

later….

Friday, November 5, 2010

Trip to the Veterinarian

Thursday was the day to take Bandit to the vet for his shots.  He liked the car ride just fine and liked sniffing all around the outside of the vets building. The inside, not so much.

He kept looking out the window and going to the door in the waiting room.  His nose knows that kind of place.   He objected loudly to the drawing of blood and it took 3 of us to get the kennel cough medicine into his nose.

Teddy went along for the ride.  He was a hit with the employees at the vet’s and sat up and begged for treats.  I wanted to know what he weighed as he was a bit too pudgy the last time we were there.  He is down to 29 lbs from 33 lbs so the diet is working for him.

Bandit seemed very thin when I first got him, his backbone stood up and there was no padding on his ribs.  Now his backbone is invisible and his ribs are well padded. I don’t know what he weighed before but now he is 49 1/2 lbs which the vet says is a bit too much for his short legs to carry around.  So now they will both be on a diet. 

Went over the the Butter Street Barn this afternoon and enjoyed a visit with my “antique” friends.  We made plans for breakfast on Wednesday at the local greasy spoon restaurant.

Got a call from my doctor’s nurse yesterday and now have an appointment for next Wednesday afternoon to talk about chemo.  I’m making a list of questions.  You can submit any you have in the comments.

Later….

 

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Chemo Findings

Looking at the notes I made while on the phone with the doctor yesterday, he said “low dose” so all the info I find may be for “regular dose”. 

Taxol will probably make me infertile - HAHA.  It will probably make my hair fall out and I’ll find out if that doctor who took the cyst off the top of my head several years ago did what I asked him to do.  I asked that he make the scar look like a smiley face.

It may make me sick and have a low red blood cell count.

It may make my finger nails and toe nails fall off or maybe just get sore or maybe just get lines in them.  

I don’t have any toenails – HAHA.  I had them all permanently removed due to severe ingrown toenails.  Actually I think it was reverse evolution, toenails turning back into animal claws.

This all may happen or may not happen.  If it is low dose it may not happen, at least not all of it.  Besides, they have fixes for a lot of it.   Like you can put your fingers in ice water while you get the chemo and that may prevent fingernail damage.

Why don’t drugs have side affects like – may make wrinkles go away; athlete’s foot may disappear; your warts may fall off; your hair may curl.  Oh well. 

That’s enough to know about chemo for now.  Lets go for the one day at a time thing.

By the way, I watched the DVD of disturbia Tuesday evening.  It made me think of a Hitchcock movie, lots of suspense and a few twists, but aimed at the teeny-bopper set.  Still a good movie and it beat all the election results trickling in bit by bit.

 

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Health News

Do you really want to hear all the health news?  I assume you do, so if you don’t, stop reading now.

My oncologist is out of town so when I called for results of my PET scan a different doctor called back with the results. 

He says I have 4 small finger-tip size spots on my liver.  The bone in my hip has improved, probably from the radiation.

He would recommend chemotherapy using Taxol.  He says that is given once a week for 3 weeks and then take a break.  If he said how long the break would be I didn’t catch it.  He said they have very good results with this treatment.

The reason I haven’t had any chemotherapy before is that it doesn’t do much for bones but works well on soft tissue. 

He did say that my brain looked normal!  So there!

My doctor will be back on the 10th and I chose to wait for her to come back to start treatment.  He said those few days wouldn’t make any difference.

So I’m looking on the next few days as a break, time to get used to the idea of chemo.  Time to read about Taxol on the internet.

I shopped today at Walmart and the clerk who checked me out was sad about the election. 

I tried to explain it to her but had no luck.  She said all those rich CEO’s will get a break from Republicans. 

I asked her where she would go to look for a job – some poor man or a CEO of a company.  She didn’t get it.  CEO’s are bad, poor people should have their stuff.  Sounds like Obama.

The scary part is he doesn’t just want poor people to do better, he wants to take it away from rich people (who have earned it) and give it to people who didn’t earn it. 

I tried to help a homeless person once.  After offering a few days of temporary housing he said “I want your RV”; not “I want one like that” or “you have a nice RV” but “I want YOUR RV”.  After many attempts, eventually I had to call the police to get that man to leave.

If you didn’t earn it you don’t appreciate it.  If it is given to you it isn’t worth much.  Time after time that has been proven to me. 

So all you young people get out there and get a good job and pay your dues so I can be retired and get benefits now and….

later….